hillary lies, obama flies, bobby brown brags
1. lowell “lieberman democrat” wiecker, former republican senator from connecticut, former independent governor of connecticut, and reigning thorn in cheney’s ass, today endorsed barack “when irish eyes are smiling” obama for president. “anything i can do to cancel out everything lieberman does.”
http://www.courant.com/news/politics/hc-caucus0405.artapr05,0,5270667.story
2. tad “i know more about losing presidential elections than anybody since adlai stevenson” devine, the democratic party strategic genius behind the superduperdelegate system that threatens to hopelessly cripple his party once again this summer, is as upbeat as ever on chances that his “system” will somehow lead to a winning candidate. “I don’t have a good idea about how we ought to go. of course, not having a good idea hasn’t stopped me before. go humphrey! i mean, go mcgovern! i mean, go carter! i mean, go mondale! i mean, go dukakis! i mean, go clinton! i mean, go gore! i mean, go kerry! i mean, go lieberman! i mean, go clinton! i mean, go ferarro! i mean, go mccain! i mean, go o-what’s-his name! the you know what!” then rove snickered. then atwater snickered. then sears snickered. then judas snickered. then hillary spit gum in his hair. then bill snickered.
http://www.projo.com/news/content/superdelegate_04-05-08_0P9L4P1_v24.39d7c30.html
3. barack “when irish eyes are smiling” obama stuck out like a sore thumb in montana this weekend.
4. hillary “have you ever been to tuzla?” clinton has been jerking tears the last few weeks with a sad, sad, tragic, sad, true, sad story of a woman in ohio named trina bachtel who died last august, 2 weeks after her baby was stillborn in o’bleness memorial hospital in athens, ohio. except that the “story” that hillary has been telling to pumped up tears:
turns out not to be true. not exactly. i mean, the woman died. her baby died. true enough. you’d think no one would need to lie about a thing like that. yet, incredibly, hillary somehow managed to turn this terrible story into a sleazy, pointless, idiotic lie anyway. watching this “woman” drag dead women and babies into the degradation and humiliation of her campaign is like watching polar bears trying to give haircuts to cheerleaders with butter knives. funny, yet horrifying. go ahead and snicker. i dare you.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/05/us/politics/05woman.html?_r=2&ref=politics&oref&oref=slogin
5. america’s first test-tube twins turned 25 this week. also this week, bobby “america’s first test-tube asshole” brown previewed his new self-published autoerotic biography. “i love myself. i nailed janet jackson, and i enjoy titanic quantities of drugs, but i really love myself.” the book reveals many mysteries, such as whether or not brown think’s he’s will endowed. physically. you-know-where. yes, you do. “ i think so.” other questions, however, remain shrouded in mystery. questions like, “how did this ass clown get to be famous in the first place, anyway?”
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23898180/
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,346311,00.html
http://www.courant.com/news/politics/hc-caucus0405.artapr05,0,5270667.story
2. tad “i know more about losing presidential elections than anybody since adlai stevenson” devine, the democratic party strategic genius behind the superduperdelegate system that threatens to hopelessly cripple his party once again this summer, is as upbeat as ever on chances that his “system” will somehow lead to a winning candidate. “I don’t have a good idea about how we ought to go. of course, not having a good idea hasn’t stopped me before. go humphrey! i mean, go mcgovern! i mean, go carter! i mean, go mondale! i mean, go dukakis! i mean, go clinton! i mean, go gore! i mean, go kerry! i mean, go lieberman! i mean, go clinton! i mean, go ferarro! i mean, go mccain! i mean, go o-what’s-his name! the you know what!” then rove snickered. then atwater snickered. then sears snickered. then judas snickered. then hillary spit gum in his hair. then bill snickered.
http://www.projo.com/news/content/superdelegate_04-05-08_0P9L4P1_v24.39d7c30.html
3. barack “when irish eyes are smiling” obama stuck out like a sore thumb in montana this weekend.
4. hillary “have you ever been to tuzla?” clinton has been jerking tears the last few weeks with a sad, sad, tragic, sad, true, sad story of a woman in ohio named trina bachtel who died last august, 2 weeks after her baby was stillborn in o’bleness memorial hospital in athens, ohio. except that the “story” that hillary has been telling to pumped up tears:
turns out not to be true. not exactly. i mean, the woman died. her baby died. true enough. you’d think no one would need to lie about a thing like that. yet, incredibly, hillary somehow managed to turn this terrible story into a sleazy, pointless, idiotic lie anyway. watching this “woman” drag dead women and babies into the degradation and humiliation of her campaign is like watching polar bears trying to give haircuts to cheerleaders with butter knives. funny, yet horrifying. go ahead and snicker. i dare you.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/05/us/politics/05woman.html?_r=2&ref=politics&oref&oref=slogin
5. america’s first test-tube twins turned 25 this week. also this week, bobby “america’s first test-tube asshole” brown previewed his new self-published autoerotic biography. “i love myself. i nailed janet jackson, and i enjoy titanic quantities of drugs, but i really love myself.” the book reveals many mysteries, such as whether or not brown think’s he’s will endowed. physically. you-know-where. yes, you do. “ i think so.” other questions, however, remain shrouded in mystery. questions like, “how did this ass clown get to be famous in the first place, anyway?”
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23898180/
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,346311,00.html
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